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October 24, 2012
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All I feel is pain
It seems that'll never change
Since my heart is such a chore
I don't want to feel anything anymore

I thought I had hit the bottom
That all memories of my heart were forgotten
I can't believe there's anything left
I can't believe it's such a mess

With me, why would anyone want to be?
I don't even want to be
"Things'll change" is such a lie
Heart and feelings please just die

I screwed up
I screwed you too
I can't control it anymore
I fear you will be one more

No sleep tonight
Buried in night
No love of life
Heart die tonight
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:iconshwiggs-kirths:
=Shwiggs-Kirths Oct 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
The heart is easily tainted, and not so easily purged.
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:iconzombiebaile:
~Zombiebaile Oct 24, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
This is a very good poem. It is very dark, and somewhat tense. I liked the uncomfortable feeling I got when I was reading.
A bit of feedback in the third stanza the first line it says, "I screwed up you." I firmly believe the word, "you," was not needed. It blocked the flow a bit. Other than that fantastic.
:iconclappingplz:
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:iconlovetadraw:
Mood: Joy ~lovetadraw Oct 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Hmmmm You're right... (goes to edit)
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:iconzombiebaile:
~Zombiebaile Oct 24, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
It's a good poem. You did a wonderful job. :D
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:iconlovetadraw:
Mood: Joy ~lovetadraw Oct 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks.
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:iconzombiebaile:
~Zombiebaile Oct 24, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
No problem. :iconblushplz:
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